This is my last installment on what I learned listening to David Richbell at an advanced mediation workshop in Sydney.

David said that the mediator needs to keep asking the question “Why is there a gap that is blocking the parties getting to Yes and Settlement of the dispute”? The Mediator needs to keep exploring what each party needs to achieve to close the gap and open the door to settlement.

If the Mediator does not work out what each party needs then it is not possible for him to go to work to close the gap.

If both parties have come to the mediation with a genuine desire to do a deal then the mediator’s task is to flush out what has to happen to get each party to Yes on a deal each can live with. The mediator’s job is to coach each party towards Yes by identifying and dispelling misconceptions and invalid assumptions that are getting in the  way of forward movement towards a deal.

The Mediator can apply his skills to “re-frame” words used in any offer or counter offer to make it easier to extract a response that moves the a bit closer.

The Mediator can use techniques like hypotheticals and reality testing to create impetus when a party is blocked or stuck. She can assist in constructing offers that have a better chance of success.

The mantra to keep putting in each party’s mind is “What deal can you live with?” and contrasting that with the litigation alternative with all its uncertainties and risks.

In a future blog post I will be putting up a whole list of MEDIATOR CHALLENGES that have been put together by MATA (Mediation and Training Alternatives) and invite you to ADD TO THIS LIST drawing on your own experiences OR to post a COMMENT outlining any personal experience you have had with one of these Challenges (or some challenge not included in the List) and how you personally dealt with it.

Cheers

Christopher Whitelaw